Mickey

I have to get rid of this small Mickey Mouse myself because Mom is not home and I just can’t take it anymore. So out of the closet came the trap and into a corner which I felt was strategic.  Because I always make it a point to know my audience and all other targets for that matter, not too long after I set up trap, Mickey Mouse indeed ran through the glue board.  He was too fast and too small though. And so cheating gravity, it managed to extricate itself from the adhesive. 

Obviously then, the wisest course of action was to move the trap into another strategic corner in the hopes that Mickey would be daft enough not to recognize the trap if he saw it again.  But you see I have never done this before. This being new to me, I suddenly got curious and wondered: Would Mickey be daft enough to fall into the same Trap if it remained in the exact same place looking the exact same way  or is the little rodent smarter than me? 

I wondered too whether it is true what they say that the likes of Mickey Mouse strike back after perceived attacks by chewing on your stuff because the strike back is as instinctive upon all animals as fear and territorialism.  Cats will scratch your eyes out when you step on their tails and dogs will bite your hands off when you get their food.  Mickey Mice, being less confrontational than other animals, attack your stuff.  I read in a book that they have a distinct ability of sensing when something or someone is less able to fight back. 

I’m more inclined to believe though that the holes they leave on plastic wares have less to do with anything else than raw need. Perceived attack or without, the Mickey Mice of the world chew on stuff for the same reason that seagulls lunch on fish. And they’d be like, “Nothing personal, Man. I’m just hungry.”  Mickey chews on stuff because it’s the next best thing to food conveniently laid out on the floor.

But just in case it makes a difference – there is no harm in trying – I began to speak in my most reasonable tone, “Look Mickey, wherever you are, I know you can hear me.  It is not my wish to harm you. However, you here in my house is not good.  There are sanitary standards to conform to.  Since obviously you will not listen to reason (I make no judgment here; A rodent’s gotta do what a rodent’s gotta do) you leave me no other recourse. This is not aggression only self-defense.”

I know my speech is not going to help. It will continue to chew on my stuff until it gets stuck onto the adhesive.  And that’s the one thing I genuinely envy about Mickey: being guided by nothing else but instinct without any regard for sanitary standards, house rules and general sense of decency. Won’t you tell me this before you die: Are you happier? I actually think that you may be.

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Development: It did run onto the same trap in the exact same place. LOL. Cute.